Of Maori Chieftains and Titanium Bricks

I havent posted for a while now and if you are wondering what exactly on God's Green Earth I 'm doin', then you are in luck. I am going to tell you something so profound that you'll even fail to understand what I intend to mean. Thats okay, dont maim yourself for that. But if you are one of those nasty egotistical individuals who doesnt really care about the platonic activities of fellow mortals and yet find yourself reading this then, my dear friend, you are not really what you think you really are! Now I think must go easy on 'really', really. Oh well...

As you probably figured out, I'm try to beat the extraordinary ennui surrounding me by trying to come up something so boring that'll even make Night Shyamalan's piece of absolute crap, The Village, look good! For those who havent seen it, make sure you take your sleeping bag with you. Might come handy, trust me!

Anyways, coming back to my recent engagements, I was wondering if anyone would believe if I told them that I am actually a Maori Chieftain and have been hired by the CIA to spy on those I shall not speak of! If you dont believe me, then I'll have to warn you to watch your back the next time you enter an empty elevator! But if you do believe me (please let me know who you are) then I think you must have hit your head with a Titanium Brick. Get it straightened out, buddy, and if possible give me the Titanium Brick! I'm sure I can come up with better uses, maybe after knocking you down.

Well, I think you can see exactly where I'm headed next - thats right absolutely nowhere. So before you issue a bunch of fatwas, I promise to post something lil' less demented the next time.
Oh btw, the CIA story is all but not true.